Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Ask Noodles: Dating?

Note from Max: The Great Noodles has done it again. He's addressing your problems in his weekly column. Send your questions to him at TheGreatNoodles@gmail.com. Noodles will entertain questions in any area, from how to train your food human or where's the best place to keep your catnip stash to questions from your food humans on how to handle things in their lives. Today's question is about dating. Enjoy and learn. Here's Noodles..................."

Deer max
whats with the noize outside our window at nite? mom sez dat there are kats out there "dating" (she makes finger quotes when she sez dat). But neither me or my brother make sounds like dat!


Katie, thank you for your question. First, I just want to be sure that folks know this is Noodles and not Max. Max is a fantastic writer, but he invited me to participate in his blog as the advice columnist. So, if you have questions of any sort, send them my way at NoodlesTheGreat@gmail.com.

Ok, now to your question… first, cats can be noisy. Outside your home there are a number of factors involved in encouraging noisy cat behavior.

One may be a territorial scuffle. One cat roams onto what another cat considers his “pad” or territory. When this happens, something called a “throw down” or brawl ensues. The two cats argue loudly, puff up to show how massively “built” they are and may even rumble into a physical contest. In the end, one cat is the victor while the other is left to wonder how things went so wrong.

Another may be “dating” as your food human suggests. This is when two cats who hardly know each other “get together” for the evening to make a litter of smaller cats known as kittens. Many times the female cat involved will pair up with multiple other cats causing the father’s of her soon-to-be kittens to be many. When the female cat is “available” and interested in “dating” she puts out what are called pheromones – add to that the fact that she will also make some weird noises which to food humans, sound like she’s sick. To cats, however, she sounds awesome, charming, intelligent and funny… everything a male cat could want in a girlfriend.

The reason both of these factors may be unknown to an indoor cat as yourself are multiple. First, you are indoors and your territory is limited to what you see and have access to. Attempts at expansion would be futile unless you have access to a bulldozer and know how to successfully operate it. Additionally, you share this territory with a familiar feline, your bro. There is no reason for you two to argue over it, however you may get into the occasional spat over a couch cushion or food human lap.

The second factor is that you and your bro are family and are likely “fixed,” that is to say that you have been surgically altered by food humans so that you cannot have kittens. This kind of erases the desire to “get together” with another cat for the purposes of “dating.”

I hope that helps to clear up the confusion!

Best regards,



Noodles said...


Michelle said...

Great job, Noodles! You handled a delicate subject very well :-).

Loki said...

Iz good answer, safe fur kittens to read and efurrything!